


I Can't Get You Out Of My Head

by AliceWhite



Category: The Most Popular Girls in School
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Confused sexuality, M/M, Original Character(s), Stress Insomnia, Than's bad dating history
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-21
Updated: 2015-04-21
Packaged: 2018-03-25 03:02:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3794254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliceWhite/pseuds/AliceWhite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Than grew up watching Tanner from a far, admiring him. When middle school hit they went their seperate ways, now in high school they get reunited again. </p><p>Maybe Than will get a second chance at being his friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys this is my first fan fiction and I clearly don't know what I'm doing, but nonetheless I hope you enjoy.  
> Ps. I love these to cuties c:

Ever since I was little he stood out to me, I don't know why he did: he just did. He was always saying what he thought, he didn't care for how others saw him. The way he walked through life made it seem ever so simple, but in reality: it wasn't. Not for me anyway, I tried doing what he does, I tried saying what was on my mind, I tried making friends like he did. It just didn't work the same for me, as it did him. I use to watch him and Matt play Pokemon on the play ground when we were kids. We were in the same classes in grade school, we use to talk sometimes, but when middle school came around it suddenly all changed. I didn't see him as much as I usually did, I know I shouldn't be feeling this. I know I should be thinking about girls and stuff, but I just keep thinking about him, and when I did stop he was always in the back of my head. I remember hearing how him and the others joined football, I remember watching him climb the popularity pyramid, not caring about his social status, turning down girls in the nicest way possible, getting along with everyone, being so smart and helpful to others: I don't know why, but the thought of that made my heart ache a bit. I can easily remember the little boy with a lisp playing Pokemon on the playground, I can remember the boy who stood up for himself and others. The boy who was so close, yet so far away from me.  
Right now he just farther and farther away from me, I know he will never be close. As he climbs up, I'll climb down, it's wrong of me to think about him the way I do. Even as the days go on, and he fills out more: I'm not suppose to care, I should look at the girls. I should watch them the way I watched him. 

Because, two guys can't be together?


	2. When It Rains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well you guys this chapter is longer then the other one, and probably will update this fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this seems like weird or fast paced, this is my first fan fiction so please understand that it will probably suck.

It's been a week since high school started. Seven days since summer break. Last years seniors are gone. Brand new set of freshman are here. Also for the first time in the two years that I have attended Overland Park High School, I have Tanner in my class, two classes to be exact. First period English, and eighth period Gym. It's been seven days, and everyone of them I kind of spent looking at him, just looking. I realized in seventh grade; I'm not exactly into girls, but that doesn't mean I can just give up on them. I keep telling myself the 'right one' just has not past me yet. I also realized no matter how hard I try, Tanner will be in the back of my mind: no matter what. In middle school I thought I safely packed up all my thoughts about him and neatly stored them in the back of my mind, locked away behind an iron volt, under lock and key and laser security.  
Now that I think of it, laser security wouldn't really work in my mind, but the thought still counts.  
Anyway, I was good for a whole four years, I was talking to girls awkwardly, getting the wrong type of people to notice me, making myself look like a total jackass while hiding in the shadows so none will notice me anymore, and also I had my Tanner thing under control: so basically my life has been great.  
Seven days ago, I walked into first period only to see a head of dark brown locks and dark blue eyes sitting down in the middle of the class, he was looking around, probably trying to see if anyone he knows was in the class. I quickly slipped on my sunglasses, and dodged his glance, headed to the back by the windows. A few moments later and the bell rang, indicating first period had started. It wasn't a big class, about 18 kids were in it in total. Including Rachel Tice, who walked in late earning soft groans from kids saying, "Fucking Rachel Tice."  
Our teacher was young, she was explaining how we were her first class, meaning other than the ten minutes since class started, she never had a class that she taught. Sighing, I hoped she wouldn't want to do something like an ice breaker to get to know everyone in the class, and it would be easy to determine which kind of kid she'll label you as, but of course, she did. She made us write a paragraph about ourself, she wrote on the board a few simple topics like: hobbies, likes, dislikes, birthday, favorite tv show/ movie, and etc.  
Rachel Tice was the first one to read hers, other then her mean sister Bridgett, her only friend Judith, and a bunch of Gossip Girl, she wrote nothing else. A few kids went up and read theirs, and then Tanner did. My eyes went to him, he definitely looked different, he had broad shoulders and looked ripped, he had a light tan, his cheek bones were defined, and he grew into his face. I thought to myself, thank god for football, because he looked amazing.  
What.  
No.  
I shouldn't be thinking this, Tanner get of my head and back in your volt. Where are the laser when you need them?!  
I groaned and hit my head on my desk. Which must of been a bit loud, because the class turned to face me, and the teacher then made me read my paragraph, saying school isn't a place to sleep. To be honest I'd rather sleep, then be in this hell hole of a period.  
I stood up, not even bothering to take off my sun glasses, I looked around then started to read, "My name is Jonathan, but I'd rather be called Than," already I heard snickering, "I enjoy bands, drawing, and video games. I, um, like the Captain America and Ryan Gosling movies, along with horror and anime. Food is great. I don't really do anything sport related. And umm, yeah. That's all I wrote."  
I shrugged as I sat down awkwardly and watched the class for their reactions, some turn around, some giggled, and others just didn't care.  
"Well, Than, thanks for that." She said in a cheerful tone, turning away to look for someone else to pick on to read their paragraph. I laid my head back on my desk, wishing for the bell to ring.  
Five minutes before the bell rang she handed out notebooks, telling us that we must write in them everyday, saying when we woke up, when we went to sleep, what we ate for breakfast, and what we did that day. Kids groaned at what she said, I, my self wasn't really into the whole stalker notebook thing, but it's a huge grade and I don't want to repeat this class again next year when I'm a senior.  
The rest of day was fine, just me sitting in the back of class by the windows, doing nothing but doodling in my notebook. I actually liked some of my classes, then eight period gym came around, the last period until I go home, Tanner was there with his jock friends laughing around and joking.  
The gym teacher placed everyone in their squads, I was placed behind Matt Derringer, who was behind Tanner, Matt was Tanners best friend since before third grade.  
After being placed in squads we were told that we have the rest of the period to ourself, and that tomorrow we will be starting gym and to bring our clothes. I sat on the top left corner of the bleachers and went on my phone to read anything, to do something other then watching Tanner.  
"Get over him." I whispered to myself. 

 

So back to the whole 'seven days' thing, for seven long days all I did in class for first and eighth period was just kind of staring at him, telling myself to get over him, look away, do anything else.  
Yet every time I do so, I find my self back to looking at him, in my other classes I'm fine. Not one thought of him, the hall ways are fine because I never really see him walking to class. Which I'm going to take a really good thing. 

I now realized that I can't have Tanner in the back of my head, it isn't safe for me anymore. 

-x- 

"Oh, hey Than," Judith rushed, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose, "did you get the math lesson today? I, uh, didn't understand it." 

Than looked at her through his sun glasses, blinking he dully said, "no." 

She shook her head, "Ahh, sorry for bothering you Than." 

Than sighed before he stood up, grabbing his bag, he tossed across his chest, heading out for eight period. Walking, as slowly as possible, he was in no rush to get to gym. All he did in gym was sit behind the bleachers outside and draw what ever came to mind.  
It has been three weeks since school started, and Than was proud of him self, because he actually started to stare at Tanner less, his thoughts calmed down a bit. In all honestly he felt it was easier to breathe around him now. After a while of repeating 'get over him' like it was some chant, he started getting over him a little: he is proud of that. It is progress, and progress he is willing to take.  
After changing into grey sweats and a plain black T-shirt, he headed out to the field where one side kids played football, and the other kids played soccer, and those who did not want to do anything got to walk around the field.  
Readjusting his sunglasses, Than headed to the back of the bleachers to his spot.  
He loved his spot underneath the bleachers, it was quiet, the sun never really shine bright were he was, it was clean and the best part was: no one else sat there.  
On occasion kids would try to sit under the bleachers, which Than didn't really mind, as along as they didn't mind his music playing: most of the time they did mind, and left, others who come to smoke didn't care much for Than being there. Sometimes they would ask what he is eating, and he would kindly offer half a sandwich to them.  
Some days no one would come under the bleachers, those were his favorite days, he would get comfy with his music playing, eating whatever he didn't eat for lunch, or what he bought from a vending machine, just drawing. He drew anything really, he would draw the weeds sticking out of the ground or the smokers who would come.  
When he wasn't drawing he was writing in his notebook his first period teacher gave him. After a few days he came to like her, her name was Miss. White, sometimes she would write little comments on his notebook saying 'Got to sleep earlier,' or 'Get some shut eye every once in a while,' she'd doodle on little sleepy faces that he thought was adorable. Somedays he would want to write back about how he has a sleeping disorder so sleeping at regular hours is hard, but he apologizes for sometimes napping in class instead: even though he doesn't sleep in her class.  
He liked the books she would assigned for the month, one day in class she handed out a paper with ten book titles on it, one for each school month. You would pick one book to read, and then at the end of the month you would hand in a report of the book you read.  
This month he choose The Perks Of Being A WallFlower, he already read it and watched the movie, but he liked a lot.  
Checking the time on his phone, it read 2:19, only a few minutes until class ended. Than decided to gather up his thing, place them in his bag and stood up. Stretching he made his way to the front of the bleachers, looking for teachers to see if any caught him sneaking from behind the bleachers.  
He stood there just looking at the sky, wanting time to go a little bit faster.  
"JONATHAN!" someone screamed, he turned his head, only for it to meet his face. His sunglasses flew off his face, he reached up to his now bloody nose, "Oh god," he moaned

"Ahh thank goodness you didn't fall unconscious," he heard a voice reaching closer to him, " it would of been a pain to carry you to the nurses office." Chuckled a boy. 

Than turned to face who ever it was who was talking to him, so he can lash out on the poor kid, but in stead he froze.  
It was Tanner, Tanner was a few steps in front of him, everything was bright and the air seemed shallow. Taking a step back, his foot landed on nothing, and he went tumbling back, his head hitting the bleacher, causing him unconscious.  
Shit, was the last thing he heard before he blanked out. The last thing he saw was the sky filled with dark grey clouds. 

 

It is going to rain. Hard.


	3. It Pours

I heard voices, mumbled and unclear to hear. When I opened my eyes all I saw was a really bright light and a cream white ceiling.  
"Fuuuuck," I groaned covering my eyes with my arm. 

"Oh hey, you're awake," I heard a boy's voice, "The nurse just stepped out to call your parents. Are you okay?"  
I can hear the calmness of his voice as my blood rushed to my ears.  
I stayed quiet for a moment, deciding whether or not to say anything and just pretend to go back to sleep or just talk to him.  
The sleeping one, the sleeping one seemed pretty legit. 

"I, uhh, am sorry," he began, " I wasn't watching were I was throwing and, I swear I didn't see you there." 

I sighed, "Dude, it's fine, you didn't knock me out, I did that, you just jacked up my nose." 

He let out a forced chuckle, "Yeah sorry about that." 

There was an awkward silence in the room, I was only hoping that he wouldn't hear my freaking heart beat. Like honestly, it shouldn't be that loud.  
I gulped,"So like why are you here, not to be rude, but..."  
I said that in a faint whisper, but I heard his head pop up,  
"Oh, ahah, when you passed out I freaked out you hit your head, so I, uh scooped you up and ran to the nurse." He said rubbing the back of his neck. 

Silence again, this time I can feel the heat on my face growing.  
Oh. My. God. Tanner hit me in the face with a football, I fell back and get knocked out, he carries me to the nurse: I was in his arms. My face must of been on his broad chest, holy crap his scent might still be on me. Why was I down for the count when Tanner had me in his arms?! What is this anarchy, like seriously? 

No 

Stop

Get over him 

Get over him 

GET OVER HIM 

I groaned, apparently it must of been loud because he stood up really fast, the chair he was sitting on fell back and he ran to my side, " ARE YOU OKAY? WHAT HURTS, OH GOD I AM NOT A DOCTOR" he panicked. 

I flinched as he touched my arm, "...ine.. I'm fine," I lied.  
Of course I wasn't 'fine' or 'okay' because out of ever one in the world Tanner is here. 

"Why are you covering eyes, is everything too bright? Do you need the nurse?" He asked worried. 

He is only worried because he has damaged your face, and you are a victim and can sue him. Also he is a nice guy so it shouldn't be such a surprise that his is helping you out so no emotions are attached.  
He doesn't care for you, and neither do you to him. 

"No, no, no, it's ,uh, my sunglasses, were they?"

There was the silence again, third time. 

"Don't know," he whimpered, "They must still be outside Jonathan. Sorry"

"Than."

"Hmm?"

"My name, it's Than, I go by Than, not Jonathan." 

He laughed, "Why?" 

"I just don't go by your rules man." 

He laughed even more. My rapid heart beat started to slow down a bit.  
In all honestly I think it is best that I don't see him right now, I can't, not now at least when I am making process at not wanting to just stare at him. So many different things are going through my head, so many different scenarios are playing. Some good, some bad and others are just friendly. 

I need him out oh here, just for a bit so I can calm my self down a little more, my face is still warm and I really bet it is notice able. 

"In all seriousness, I need my sunglasses to see." I choked out. 

He stopped laughing, "Really?" 

"No, ish.... I just really need them." I whispered. 

The nurse walked in saying my mother will be here in a few minutes to pick me up. 

"Is like, anything of mine even with me?" 

"Uhh, I had to toss your bag, easier to carry you with it off. Sorry, I'll get it now." He said as he stood up and left the room. 

I just sighed, removing my arm from my eyes. 

"Hey honey, how's your sleeping going?" The nurse asked me as I sat up. 

She knows about about my sleeping problems, I had to tell her back in freshman year. I used to fall asleep in class sometimes, and the teacher use to sent me up to the nurses office to get a drug test. Thus, me telling her about the troubles of my sleep life.  
One look at my eyes and she nods her head, "Hun, have your parents ever thought about," 

I cut her off, " I don want to take pills for sleeping or stress, I'm fine." 

She shook her head, "You are not fine, you have dark bags underneath your eyes. How much sleep do you even get a week?" 

"Enough to function... I hope." I mumbled the last part.  
She flashed a small light into my eyes, "Follow the light with your eyes."  
I did as she said, she move it right my eyes went right: she moved it down my eyes went down. 

"Alright, well if you are feeling dizzy or uneasy go to the ER and don't sleep for eight hours," she said clinking the light off.  
I laughed.  
"I've got to say this Than, protocol. Alright, you have to get checked out by a doctor, you can not be back at school unless you have. Until then stay home and try to get some rest."

I nodded in agreement, laid back down with my arm shielding my eyes. I can hear him shuffling around the room. 

"I'll be back in a moment I just have to run some files back to the main office, it won't be more then five minutes." 

I hummed at her. 

As she left, Tanner came in with my bag, and only my bag. He nodded at her then came closer to me, putting my bag on the bed next to my legs. 

"How are you feeling?" He asked. 

"I have a concussion and a broken nose." I grumbled. 

"Erm, sorry about that... Again." 

"It's cool, like I said my fault not really yours, but, uh thanks for carrying me here." 

"Anytime," He replied, "I couldn't find your sunglasses actually." 

Fuck, I thought to myself. I didn't wear my sunglasses for sight, or bright lights: I wore then so no one would see the bags underneath my eyes, even sometimes my eyes would be red and it is a bother.  
Other kids would ask if in stoned or if I'm okay, and I just don't want to be noticed by them anymore than I already am. 

".... It's fine." I lied again. 

"Well don't worry, none of your books got wet, I hope you don't mind that I checked," he began, "it must of started raining at some point, and I would of felt even worse if I ruined your books right after I sent you to the nurse." 

I peaked from underneath my arm.  
Tanner's usually spiked up hair is now down and messy as if he had just ran his fingers through it, his white V-neck was also wet, and somewhat clinging to his perfect chest. I shut my eyes quickly.  
Not again. 

"Than," the nurse walked back in, "your mom is here to get you." 

Fireworks just went off in my head. Thank god, I thought to myself. I got up quickly, my head facing towards the ground, I would hate for Tanner to see my eyes: grabbing my bag I rushed out. Saying a quick good bye I headed outside. It was indeed was raining. Right now it seems as of it is pouring. I rushed to my mom's car and jumped in the front seat. 

"Hey mom." I greeted her as I shut the car door. 

-x-

A few days later, when I walked into class people stared at me.  
Like what, haven't they seen a broken nose before? I sat in my seat in the back of class next to the windows. Getting out my notebook for the class I heard shuffling and someone sitting down next to me.  
Which it weird, because there are like ten seats open and no one usually sits next to the freaky kid who always wear sunglasses. 

I turned my head only to find Tanner setting up his desk.  
I stared at him, I get that he is sorry and all but that doesn't mean he has to sit next to me to make up for it. 

He turned to me and smiled, "Hey Jonathan, I noticed you got new sunglasses." 

If only he were to see the death glares I'm giving him through my sun glasses. 

"Yeah, my other ones are lost, these are my back ups," I looked at him, " So, uh Tanner what made you change your spot to over here?" 

The smiled faded from his face, shit why did I say that, "Not that I mind or anything." I lied, well kind of. 

"Well you seemed so lonely back here by your self," he spoke, "Plus, I am really sorry about the other day. I want to make it up to you, be your friend." He smiled. 

I forced a laugh, "You don't have to, really how many times do I have to tell you? It was my fault I should of been paying attention to my surroundings."

He nodded a no, "I still feel guilty, let me just do this, it's the least I can do." He smiled 

I give up, letting out a sigh and put my head on my desk, wrapping my arms around my head.  
Goddamn it.  
Why can't he just leave me alone? I mean I'm trying to make it seem like I don't want him here, can he not take a hint?  
My heart is beating fast, I was doing so good.  
I was getting over him.  
I was able to breathe, why is he doing this.  
Damn it, damn it all. He must know this, he probably found out that I would stare at him sometimes, and this is a prank he is doing. The whole football team is probably in on it too, oh god why is this happening to me? 

"Than, are you alright?" Said a worried voice, "Do you need to go to the nurse?" 

I looked up, Miss. White was squatting next to me, her face carried worried lines.  
Thank you Miss. White, I thought to myself. 

"Yeah," I lied. This was my chance to get away from Tanner.  
"I'm feeling a bit dizzy." I gave her pleading eyes and a fake voice. 

She stood up nodding, "Alright," she looked like she didn't know what to do. She turned to Tanner, "Would you mind taking Than to the nurses office?" 

"Yeah, sure." He smiled at her. 

I groaned lightly. Mission failed. 

I stood up, grabbed my things and walked to the door, Tanner then followed in pursuit. I hurried down the halls, not wanting to be alone with him, not wanting to see or hear his golden voice. Turning the corner, he grabbed my wrist.  
On reflex I pulled my wrist to my chest, holding it with my hand.  
"What?" I hissed lightly. 

I am so glad he can't see my eyes, because right now they are filling up with tears.  
I don't even know why they would, I just want to get out of this situation at fast as I could. I really can't do this right now, I need to clear my head, clear it away of Tanner. 

"Jonathan what's wrong you seem really upset?" He asked, his blue eyes shining at me.  
I turned my head away, mumbling. 

"What?" He asked stepping closer.  
I took a step back. 

"It's Than." 

He blinked at me, slightly confused.  
I threw my head back groaning, "I just want to be alone." 

"Why, did something happen?" He asked with curiosity in his voice, his eyes stared at mine, as if he can see through my black sunglasses directly into my eyes.  
I squeezed my eyes shut and turned around," I can't deal with it anymore, I don't want to talk about it. Leave me alone." I started to walk away, he is just. Just. I don't know what he is doing but I can't be here with him while I'm like this.  
"Is someone bothering you? I can help, just tell me,"  
I cut him off before he can finish his sentence, "Yeah, you, just leave me alone!"  
With that I ran.  
I ran to the nurses office.  
I didn't look back for a reaction from him, I don't want to see him, I don't want to know what his response was back to me. 

All I wanted was sleep, quiet and Tanner out of my head.


	4. Bathrooms

Chapter Three. 

It has been three weeks since the small argument between Than and Tanner happened.  
Than doesn't feel bad about saying what he did, but he knows if he did: he would fall back in to his thoughts of Tanner.

Tanner hasn't looked at him since then, it was for the best Than thought.  
It was better off this way. Nowadays his mind has been getting better, he doesn't really looked at him anymore.  
Than walked into first period, his sunglasses perched on his now healed nose, and huge jacket on his thin frame. It was now a few weeks into autumn and the weather had been getting a bit chilly, and Than didn't like being cold.  
Taking a seat in the back he stared out the window.  
He liked the warm colors of autumn, and the crispy sound of leaves when you step on them. Somedays would be warm, others cold, it was a mystery that he enjoyed sometimes. Only sometimes.  
When the bell rang, Miss. White stood up from her desk.  
She always seemed to be in the class, he would come in early to find her eating at her desk. She would offer some of her everything bagel with cream cheese on it, to him: he would always decline and just go to his seat.  
She stood up and greeted the class, like she does every morning.  
"Today we will be changing seats." she pointed to the board, on the board were rectangles with numbers on it.  
"Now that I know all your lovely names and faces I think it is time to switch it up a bit." She smiled at them. Than's eyes opened in horror, not only would he have to move from his beloved spot by the window, but he had a weird feeling that the world would put Tanner by him in spite of him trying to get over him. Which was going pretty great.  
"The numbers on the board means the desk number: you will pick a number from the bowl and that will be your seat until we change them again," she looked around the room, "Okay, stand up with your things and line up to get a number, and no switching numbers!"  
Than grabbed his bag and headed to the line in front of the class, Rachel Tice picked first, she ended up in the dead center of the class. As the line moved up, so did Than.  
So far no one had picked his seat, when it was his turn he went to pick one. He stopped when he heard a small hum come from Miss. White. He looked at her and she darted her eyes to a paper on left side of the bowl. He reached for it, upon opening it he smiled. Looking at her he saw a smile on her mouth, and whisper a thanks. He headed back to his seat in the back of the class by the window. Sitting down he let out a sigh of happiness, looking to the window he light out a light chuckle. He really thought Miss. White was the best teacher ever, god bless her angelic soul.  
He heard someone in from of him sit down, he looked forward smiling to see who it was.  
He saw dark locks and broad shoulders.  
"Fuck" he lightly let out.  
Miss.White is the worst person in the world, I should of just picked the paper I has going for. I should of never choose this sheet with the devils number on it, he thought to himself.  
No one sat to his right, or adjacent to him, Tanner was the only one by him.  
He heard Tanner yawn.  
This was going to be hard now, but I can power through this, Than thought to himself. Just pretend that he is someone else, and not Tanner. You'll be fine. 

 

-x-

When eighth period came, he changed into his sweats and a black T-shirt. He threw on his jacket as he headed to the bleachers. Sitting in his spot he turned on his music and took out his sketch book, and started doodling, while munching on Cool Ranch Doritos.  
When it was time to go back in he would put his sketch book safely in his bag, sneak out from underneath the bleachers and walk back inside. When he went back inside he didn't bother changing back into regular clothes, so he just waited by the doors until the bell rang.  
When it did ring, he walked to his locker, opening it he took what he needed and left what he didn't. Sighing as he shut his locker, locking it up, he pushed through a crowd of teens and heading to the vending machines on the other side of the building. As he walked down the hallway, teens stared to become few.  
He made his way to the vending machine stuffed a dollar in it, pushed down on the half and half Snapple tea. He waiting a moment before it popped down, reaching for it, he heard voices and footsteps.  
"Hey Johnny, did ya know only two types of people wear sunglasses in doors?" A rough voice spat out.  
Than froze and looked behind him. 

"Aha," laughed the other boy, he assumed was Johnny, "No I didn't, what are they?" 

They stopped right in front of Than, and the named boy who was a foot taller then the teen spoke, "Blind people, and douche bags, and I'm guessin you're not blind, are ya?"  
The older boys laughed as Than went to back up, only to hit up against the vending machine.  
"Fuck." He let out as his dropped his bag. 

"Fuck indeed." Said the boy, as he grabbed Than by the shoulders shoving him into the closest bath room.  
Than tried squirming out of the other boys grip, but he couldn't. His weight less then hundred and fifteen pounds and he was extremely weak. He didn't have much muscle because he doesn't work out. He doesn't work out because he doesn't have energy, he doesn't have energy because he doesn't sleep. 

Than let out grunts and kept kicking. The Johnny guy, punched him in the stomach. Which made Than gasp for air, his limbs fell and he stopped struggling.  
"Johnny hold him." The other teen spoke, as he tossed Than to him.  
Johnny pinned him up against his chest.  
"Well, whatcha hiding under your sunglasses here, hmm?" The boy spoke as his reached for Than's sunglasses. Than panicked and started kicking his legs, they couldn't take off his sunglasses.  
No way in hell are they, Than thought.  
He hated his black bags under his eyes, he hated when people saw it. They'd made fun of him for it, for sure.  
He manage to kick the older teen in the stomach, but he just laughed it off, "Boy are ya weak."  
Than gasped in horror.  
The boy ripped off Than's sunglasses and stomped on them.  
He gripped Than's face with his hand, "Aha Johnny look at his eyes!" He laughed out, "Do ya watch porn all night or somethin?"  
"Ah whatever Ty, let's just dunk him." Whined Johnny.  
Ty agreed and dragged Than into an open stall. Than now started screaming for help, which he thought was useless because it was after school hours now and no one stayed after school.  
Ty grabbed his head and pushed it into the toilet.Than shaking his head trying to break lose. He was terrified, he used to get mocked for wearing his sunglasses all the time, but it never leads to anything like this.  
Johnny flushed the toilet and laughed with Ty. They repeated this cycle until a door slammed open.  
All of a sudden the grip on his head was gone and Johnny was yelling at someone.  
Than stood up coughing, trying to catch his wet breath.  
He looked to where they were.  
His eyes opened wide as he choked on air, he watched Tanner, he was the one punching Ty in the face, one hand on the boy's collar of his shirt and the other hand slamming on to his face. Johnny tried pulling Tanner off of his friend, but Tanner was obviously stronger. 

"...Tanner." Than spoke lightly, Tanner stopped punching Ty and look over to where the wet boy stood by the stalls with his jacket hanging off his wet shoulders. 

Than was surprised at how weak and strained his voice was, but even more surprise that he actually said the male's name.  
Tanner looked at him, eyeing Than. His face looked shocked and sick at the same time.  
Than then realized his sun glasses were broken on the floor in front of him, shielding his eyes he turned around.  
Tanner let go of the boy, and him and Johnny ran out the bathroom.  
Tanner started to walk over to Than. 

"Go away!" Yelled Than as he heard Tanner's footsteps climb closer, they didn't stop at Than's request. 

Than started to run away, but Tanner yanked on his wrist and pulled the thin boy into his chest: holding him tightly.  
"You're seriously an idiot." Muttered Tanner. 

Than couldn't hear him so well, his face grew red and warm, his knees felt wobbly, he was shaking in the others grip. Than gasped, only to get his nose filled with the scent of the other boy. For some reason, Tanners scent made him feel tired and weak. Than could just stand there forever, in the others warm embrace and intoxicating smell.  
Tanner pulled him out of the hug, and looked Than in the eyes.  
Than immediately snapped out it, only to see dark blue orbs stare at him.  
Than shut his eyes tightly and swung his head to the left.  
Tanner thought nothing of that, and guided Than to the hand dryer. 

"Sit under that." He commanded, and for some reason Than obeyed. 

Tanner walked over to the paper towel rack and grabbed some paper towels.  
It was silent, other then the noises the hand dryer made, it was scary quiet.  
Tanner used the paper towel to dry Than's face as water started to drip from his dirty blonde hair.  
He looked at Than, with a face Than couldn't recognize. Carefully wiping under Than's eyes, he spoke gently, "They didn't hit you in the eyes, did they?"  
Than flinched at Tanners words, giving his a helpless look, he didn't want to talk about his eyes. The last thing Than wants to talk about are his eyes. 

"This is why you wear the sunglasses, isn't it." Tanner started piecing things together.

Than looked at him for a moment, fuck it he thought.  
He shot up and tried running out of the bathroom. He made it three quarters of the way to the door, but Tanner grabbed him by his waist and dragged back underneath the drier.  
Than gave him a death glare, and Tanner just smirked at him as he started drying Than's hair. 

"Okay I get it you don't want to talk about your eyes," Tanner gave up, "But I don't understand why not." 

"Well I don't expect you to." He muttered turning his head. Tanner pulled his head back to face his, "Stop moving." 

He knitted his fingers in Than's dirty blonde hair with the paper towel, massaging his head a little. Than wasn't going to lie, he was actually enjoying this: he loved the way his fingers felt on his head, the way his scent wafted its way to his nose. In all honesty, he could probably get drunk off of his scent, it made him feel so relaxed and calm.  
This whole situation is confusing him, why was Tanner even doing this?  
Especially, after what happened between them three weeks ago.  
"..Why,. Why are you doing this? I mean you can just leave." Than spoke quietly as he looked at his own hands. 

Tanner chuckled lightly, "I am only doing this because I want to be your friend Jonathan." 

"If you wanted to be my friend so badly then why do you call me 'Jonathan'?" Than spat out. 

Tanner shot him a confused look, "Isn't that your name?"

Than stared at him, "Yeah well, Than is a nickname that I preferred to be called." 

"What?," Tanner laughed, "No one calls you that." 

"People do so call me that." He said glaring at the teen.

Tanner scoffed, "Who?" 

Than looked down, "Miss.White, the nurse, my mom.." 

Tanner put his arm on than shoulder, Than looked at him.  
"Well I'm not any of them." 

Than shoved his arm off of his shoulder, fixing the over sized jacket that was clinging on his shoulders as if it were for its dear life.  
"Whatever" he muttered. 

"Alrighty, you're just about dried off." Tanner smiled standing up, he extended his hand to Than.  
Than looked at it.  
He didn't grab it, he just got up on his own, and looked at Tanner.  
Suddenly everything became all silent and awkward. 

"Well, thanks and all, but I, uh, have to go home now." Than gave Tanner a quick flat line smile, then moved past Tanner and walked out of the bathroom. 

"Wait," Tanner yelled through the hall. 

Than turned around, "What?" 

Tanner caught up to him, "Let's hang out." He smiled. 

"No." 

Tanner looked at Than, he blinked, "What?" 

"I don't want to hang out, I just kinda want to go home." Than said blankly. 

This really isn't suppose to be this way. Than is trying to completely get over his one-sided feelings towards Tanner, but Tanner wants to be friends with Than.  
Than knows if he becomes friends with Tanner then he will only end up with a broken heart and he can not deal with that at all. 

"Oh," Tanner said staring at the floor with his brow furrowed. His eyes lit up for a moment, "Then maybe later?" 

Than didn't know why Tanner wanted to be his friend so badly, Than was not a very sociable person. Some days, due to his sleeping problems, he would come to school grumpy and say things he wouldn't normally say. The other kids usually avoided him, unless they really had to interact with him. 

"I'm getting tired of this, leave me alone." Than shot as he started to leave. 

"Why do you push people away? Why don't you let anyone in, I see how you purposely dodge people, aways in the back hiding, I just want to know why you do what you do!" 

Than stopped, he didn't even bother to turn to face Tanner with tired bare eyes that would only end up in tears, "I don't want to end up hurt, and it's not everyone; just you, Tanner." 

Blood was rushing to his ears as he quickly walked towards the exist. His mind only filling up of what Tanner's face might look like right now as he laid a bomb on him. He went home that day, not able to get any bit of sleep.


	5. Parking Lots

Chapter Four. 

It has been three days and I have gotten less then four hours of sleep. Tanner hasn't been to school since the day he insisted on helping me and then tried to worm his way into my head. 

"Than," Miss. White spoke, I turned to face her, "Hey, no day dreaming in class." She smiled brightly, god, how can she be so energetic and warmly at half past eight in the morning?

I nodded, and then gave a quick smile to her. She turned her attention back to the class, and I sighed.  She went back to teaching something about english or dead writers, I don’t know.

"Thank god it's Friday." I murmured looking out the window. 

The rest of the day seemed to go by pretty quick, it rained during gym so we stayed inside, instead of going outside like normally. I climbed up on the bleachers, to the corner upper left side and sat. I spent my gym period scrolling down Tumblr, just reposting and liking, just something to kill time until I had to go home. 

When the bell rang I hurried down the stairs and quickly walked to my locker.   
Ever since my first meeting with John and his whats his face, friend, I have been a bit skeptical of being alone in the halls during and after school, as a precaution I basically rush to get to classes faster, and out of school as soon as possible. Also, I have started to avoid the vending machines in the halls, and have started going to the ones all the way in the cafeteria. Even though it is extremely out of my way and in no direction of where I exist the building usually, but safety comes first. Being I am on my last spare pair of sunglasses, and is in no mood to buy more.

"Uh, Than, do you have the, um, the math notes from today?" 

I turned around, it was Judith. I sighed, locking my lock, "Sorry, but I didn't take them." She is always asking, when will she learn that I don’t use effort in math, or school, or life?

"Ok, uh sorry." She turned and left with Rachel awkwardly. 

I closed my eyes and sighed, opening them, I started to walk to the vending machines, what can I say, I like my Snapple. 

"Jonathan, hey!" shouted someone weakly, I turned around, it was Tanner.

"Oh shit." Oh shit indeed. Screw you Snapple, screw you world, I would say screw you Tanner, but in some sense I kind of do. STOP THAT BRAIN YOU DO NOT WANT TO SCREW HIM.

I turned forward, and started to walk faster. What was he doing here? He wasn't here all day, why is he here now? The dude looked horrid, I would pick up my paced, but so would he.

"Hey! Stop!" he yelled this time catching up, just before I got to the door he grabbed my wrist, pulling me back. "Jonathan, I said stop, just for a minute."

I snapped my head to face him, "Yeah, well I said to call me Than. I guess we don't get what we want."  
I looked him in the eye, he looked terrible, and to be honest his grip wasn't all at that tight, I mean if I tried hard enough I can break from it. Maybe. No. wait, maybe. Ehhh.

"Just, listen for a minute." he spoke. His hair didn’t even looked brushed, and he was sweating. He was wearing layers of clothes, and yet still manage to feel cold.

I scoffed, like hell I will, I went to break free from his weakened gripped, but he wouldn't let me. So I couldn’t break free from his sickly grip.

"Before, you said you were afraid to get hurt again, what did you mean? Like, I remember you from elementary school, you seemed fine so what happened in middle school?"

I looked at him, he was pale and sweating even more, his face was tainted pinkish, and that is no way from me, he must really have a high fever, or a death wish.

"Oh what, did you just remember we went to the same elementary school?"

"Huh, no?" His face scrunched up.

"Well what ever, I'm going home, and, huh, you should too: you're not looking so well. So let me go, and never speak to me again." I gave him a quick smile and turned and finally managed to escaped his weakened grip. Score.

Yeah, I realized I'm being a huge dick to a possible dying Tanner, but I haven't slept in a while and I really can not deal with this right now. Also, by the way he looks, he seems like he is going to collapse any minute, and honestly I do not have to strength to carry him on a day were I got sleep, not to mention one where I didn't. 

"Dude, I have been in bed for the last few days just thinking about it for some reason, yeah, I get that you hate me and all, but you just please put this out of my head?" With his comment I stopped in my tracks. Fuck.

I looked at him, why the hell is he even thinking about me, also, if he gets that I do not want to talk to him: why does he insist on taking to me?

I sighed, this isn't any of his business, I looked at him, he is begging me to tell him with his sick eyes. Well maybe somewhere in this grouchy form I take is a little, tiny, small soft spot for the dying kid. 

"Whatever, just fine," I can not deal with this, I mean I tell him: he leaves me alone, good deal, yes? "First you have to step back, my immune system does not deal well with colds, or flu's or what ever you got." I do not get much sleep, I never have energy, my body is physically weak and I have a some what low white blood cell count: I can not get sick, if I do it will be hell.  
He let go of me, and took a step back.

"It is not of your business, but I am correct to assume that you will not leave me be if I don't tell you?"  
He nodded, I sighed.

"Really bad break up, now leave." I quickly turned, and walked out the door.  
The chilled air hit me as I walked out, the rain didn't help at all, I pulled up my hood and started walking across the stupidly large parking lot of the school. It started raining sometime during lunch, thankfully I had the right sense to call my mother, to see if her lovely soul could pick me up.  
   
My mother could not pick me up today, something about her work stacking up and conference calls that needed to be done.  
Personally do not trust myself driving, especially with other cars on the road.

Even with putting space between me, and a very sickly Tanner, I believe I'm not going to attend school for the sheer fact that I am walking in the rain with a thin hoodie on and really tight skinny jeans, cursing my wonderful legs I like to show off.  
I am well aware of the fact that I have been a total D bag to Tanner, but it is the only way I can function, knowing that he will not talk to me, and eventually leave me alone. Thus, making my thoughts be filled with something else, something more peaceful and serine, instead of Tanner's nice face and his stupid adorable laugh, and oh mY GOD I AM DOING IT AGAIN! I CAN NOT TRUST MY MIND ANYMORE AND WHY IS THERE TWO STOP SIGNS? 

I am currently now seeing double. This is clearly not a good sign.

Dear mother, I am sorry that you had to deal with 17 years of a stubborn boy who refuses to seek help, or take advice, and is a consent dick weed. Also, I finished off all the Oreos you had stashed away in the pantry. Good bye, your awful son Than. 

I can feel my legs getting tired, curse my weak body. As I continually began to slow down in the middle of the parking lot and shiver, I was apparently blocking someone from driving home.

"What the fuck, get the hell out of my way or I'm running over your ass!"   
I turned my head, I know that screeching voice, that high pitched bitch of a voice. I stopped shivering, no one can save me now.

Brittany Matthews.

"Fucking hell, move it asshole." She yelled, honking in her pink hooded convertible car. 

I started to walk over to the extremely pink car. My eyes are aching, and my legs wobbled with each step.

"Oh my fucking god," she scoffed, "it's fucking sunglasses Than, what the ever fuck do you want?" She asked sarcastically.  
    
I placed my hand on the hood of her car, "Help," was all I can manage, before I fell to the ground. She was, right now the only hope of no dying, and getting warm, and do I feel warm air coming out of her car? Because that feels real nice.

Note to self: When body running on fumes, do not interact with Tanners, do not get into arguments, and do not decide to walk in the freezing rain without an umbrella, wearing a hoodie and really tight skinny jeans.

"Shit" was the last thing I heard, before my eyes closed and my mind wandered into my dreamscape.

-x-

"uuuuckkkkkkk," was my first word, opening my eyes I soon realized I'm not in the school's parking lot in the rain, nor my own bed. Also, a scent of strawberries filled the entire room, along with the color pink.   
Sitting up, I rubbed my eyes and looked around, it was clear that I was in a girls room. Yikes.

It was neat, a computer stood in the back corner of the room, Glee posters were hung up along with a huge mirror and dresser. The room it self was a soft pink, the floor was wooded, and I am not wearing pants. What the fuck? I sat up, looking at what I was wearing. I heard yelling and my head snapped to the closed door.

"Fucking gosh mom, kill me now! So fucking what I have a boy in my mother fucking room." she screamed in the hall, my eyes darted at the white door, ready for her to come in. After hearing that voice, I know where the fuck I am, and honestly I do not like it.   
I looked at what was on me, I was wearing a long sleeve shirt that went past my fingers, it was lavender and slightly big on me. Or a long sleeve dress?  
   
"No fucking way mom, do not come the fuck in my room, gosh this is why I don't bring my friends over." the door opened, showing a slightly pissed off Brittany Matthews. 

"Oh good, look who finally decided to wake the hell up," she started to walk over me, stuffing her phone in her back pocket, "what the hell, just passing out like that in front of my car like that?" 

I looked at her, my sunglasses are off, and she isn't staring at me like I'm weird, or questioning about my eyes. 

"Where are my pants?" was all I can manage, I mean this whole situation is freaking me out. Sitting in a girls room, wearing what possibly is a dress, without my sunglasses. Oh and not to mention the girl is Brittany fucking Matthews.

She gave me her classic "what the fuck" face, I looked at her wide eyed. She bursted out into a fit of laughter, tearing she spoke, "Oooooohh mmy godd, Oh my fuckkkking GOD." 

She repeated this for about five minutes, stretching out my arms, I yawning my stomach growled.   
"What time is it?" I asked already knowing I will never get to know where my pants are.

She calmed down a bit, still chuckling a little, she said, "It is like 9.”   
I looked at the window, it was pretty bright out to be nine, but still my mom is probably freaking out that I am not home or called her.   
I started to get up, but Brittany looked at me with a glare.   
"Uhh, thanks and all but, I, uh, have to go home. My mom is going to freak out if I am not there." 

"Oh, yeah she called." 

My head snapped towards her. " What do you mean she called?" I asked irritably. My poor mother, oh I love her so much, she is probably cursing me out for some reason, and probably found out about the Oreos I ate, that was hers.

"After I had to drag you up off the parking lot in the pouring rain to get you in may car, your phone rang. I answered it naturally." She shrugged looking at her bubbly bubble gum pink nails.  
I looked at her in horror, oh god she spoke to mom, was all I could think.

"I told her how you blacked out, and that I was driving you to my house."

"What did she say?"

"She was all like 'What happened is he okay, do you want me to come get him'," she spoke waving her arms and rolling her eyes.   
"I told her she can stay put and I can handle it." she shrugged, "But then when I had tried to wake you up, you wouldn't so I called her and told her, she then like fucking sighed and asked if I could watch you over night."  
"Over night?" I asked.

"Yeah, Dude you passed out on me yesterday after school in the rain, remember?" She looked at me if I were retarded, shaking her head, she stood up, "Well what ever your awake now, so that means I get fucking answers."   
She squinted her eyes at me, "Why the fuck did you decide to suddenly sleep on front of my car? Also, why the fuck do you look like a zombie?"

I sighed, running my hands over my face I mumbled.

"I didn't fucking hear you."

My head shot up to look at the ceiling, "I suffer from stressed induced insomnia, and lately I have been under a shit load of stress and fucking anxiety. And so yesterday," I turned my head to face her, " I had to deal with a very stressful person-"

"Who,fucking Deandra? I swear she gets on my-" 

"What? No, not Deandra, someone else."

"Then fucking who?" 

I looked at confused, I had no clue to why she wanted to know, or why she even cared. Apparently she caught on to my look and came close to me, hand on her hips and face out forward towards mine. "Fucking answer me." she growled. Crap.

I'm not going to lie, Brittany Matthews scares me, like ever since she transferred here in the third grade. I am only happy that I actually slept and am not grumpy and mean, other wise I'd probably say something that get me killed. I do not want to be on the mercenary cheerleader’s hit list. 

"Tanner Christensen" I said real lowly, hoping that she would probably hear some other name. 

I looked at her, she closed her eyes and took a deep breathe, straighten her back she exhaled and opened her eyes.   
"Well Tanner," she heard right, "Is going to pay to get the inside of my fucking car cleaned." she looked me dead in the eyes, her eyes burning, "Because someone had to fall in fucking mud and I had to drag their ass into my car not to mention ruined my new cheer uniform.

"Mud?" I asked.  
She looked at me, scoffing," Yeah fucking mud. When I brought you here I had to change your clothes so I wouldn't drag mud everywhere. I even cleaned you up a bit, you're welcome." 

Dear mom, I, your son, am very sorry I have disappointed you. I was put for the count while a girl undressed me, nay mother not a girl, quite possibly the devil in a teenage girl form has seen my impure skin. I am so very sorry. I promised you I wouldn’t show my body off anymore and try to remain pristine until marriage, but the devil has washed me. Literally.

"Uhh don't think anything fucking gross Than, I didn't do anything to you, and anyways it's not like I haven't seen anything you have on other boys." she laughed at the last part. Honestly, Brittany was a really nice looking girl, if my brain wasn't fried with Tanner and a messed up dating history, then maybe I would see this in a different light. Maybe her whitish blonde hair and strawberry scent could change the way I feel about, maybe it could change my sexuality. Maybe I can actually do something with my life.

Or you know, not. Brittany would never date me, and no matter the amount of fresh strawberries could make me want to date the devil’s evil step mother.

She turned and headed to the open door, “Come on, I’ll give you a spare toothbrush” With that she started to walked down the hall. 

I quickly got up to follow, it turns out the dress shirt thingy I was wearing went about a little higher then my mid thighs, also I was wearing black knee socks. Following her into the bathroom, I thanked her for helping me and providing me with her clothes. Her response was something along the lines of, you are to skinny and small for my dads clothes and that I am lucky, I fit in her clothes with room to spare or I would be naked. And then she proceeded to take pictures of me and my red from embarrassment face. 

When she left, I took out the toothpaste and place a dollop on the tooth brush and started to brush my teeth, it was not until I looked in the mirror that I then realized the bags under my eyes were completely gone.  
“Holy crap” was all that I muttered. My face also looked brighter and more smooth, I turned my head in different directions in the mirror to get a better look. This was a amazing, the bags have been under my eyes since like eighth grade. 

All of a sudden I heard laughing followed by,” It looks awesome right? Make up is really amazing, well, foundation is.” 

I didn’t know if I should be horrified or shocked, or amazed. So instead I just kind of took a breathe and gave her smile. “Why are you helping me? You could of just left me there or dropped me off at me house?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to upload.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haha I am not dead, just back from an unneeded hiatus.

She scoffed in my face, "Because, I am a nice person, dammit."

I really tried not to laugh, I really did, but, I just couldn't. I laughed, I, Jonathan Getslinhaumer, laughed at Brittany Matthews.

_Goodbye my sweet, caring mother, for I have really fucked up this time._

Brittany looked at me with cold eyes, yes everyone, I am fucked now, there is no way out she is in the door way, I am by the window: which is shut and I think I am on the second floor anyway.

"Ahh, I am a fucking nice person Than, I fucking helped you when I could of ran you over."

I stopped laughing, she is true, knowing if I was Shay Van Buren or Rachel Tice, I would of been gone, and left in the cold mud to die.

"Yeah, about that," I looked up at her, "Thanks, I really appreciate it Britt."

"Whatever." She walked out of the bathroom, I finished brushing my teeth and walked down stairs.

Brittany had a nice home, which is a bit surprising coming from the fact: she swear worst than a sailor, she'll easily break a neck and shrugged as if she stopped on a bug, and her attitude is awful. Her house, and her room is neat, with warming colors and an easy invite: it is actually pretty cozy.

"So Than, why were you running from Mr. I'm-a-nice-guy-Tanner?" She asked walking into the living room, tossing me a poptart. I stared at her, I can't lie to her, she could probably tell if I was lying, but than again I can't easily tell her the truth with out getting disgusted. I need to by my self time, " Can I at least have my clothes back, I am feeling a bit awkward wearing your dress and knee socks." Ok, that wasn't a lie, but at least a few minutes to think of a reasonable lie to tell her, because once again: I am still slightly scared of her.

She glared at me," Fine, but when I come back you better tell me the fucking truth Than, or so help me, you will never see the outside again." For a moment the cozy atmosphere felt sicking to be by, I sat on the couch and ate my strawberry poptart.

Does Brittany have a thing for strawberries, or something? I asked my self.

Ok I can tell her the truth, and explain how fucked up I am, but then I would have to explain how, _he_ , fits in with the story. Anyway the whole thing is one big complex story. 

But, I don't know, I have this weird feeling about it, like maybe she would't judge me, or maybe she would understand whats happening and maybe even help me through it. My gut is telling me I can trust her, but my mind is saying she is Brittany Matthews and she'll laugh in my face and tell the whole school and Tanner will be so disgusted he would never talk to me again.

Wait, that doesn't sound to bad, Tanner not talking to me with his sweet voice, dammit, not now brain. 

Brittany walked in, throwing my clothes at me she growled, "Spill It."

I inhaled a strong scent of strawberry as tugged my jeans up my legs. Seriously, Brittany, do you have a strawberry fetish or-? I didn't bother leaving the room as I changed, it didn't matter now because she had seen me undressed before, also she didn't seem to mind. The only think she seemed to mind was me not speakings as I changed. She watched with a glare as she sat down in a chair across from where I was sitting. If she wanted to looking intimidating: she did. 

I sat down with a sigh, I have to tell her, maybe leave some parts out, but I have to tell her. 

"Ok, just bare with me, it all kind of started back in grade school..." 


End file.
